Monday, May 26, 2008

Why I Haven't Returned Your Calls & Emails

Hooray! We are homeowners as of this past Friday!

I know I haven't yet returned your calls and emails. The reason can best be summed up by the email I just penned to a friend:

I hope Nebraska is being kind to you and that your training is going well. Please come back soon so we can be Real Friends.

We haven't yet heard from Andy but I'm sure he was enjoying his holiday and we'll hear from him tomorrow. I'm sorry you were away instead of relaxing by your pool. I appreciate you calling him.

So this is sorta funny: After I got off the phone with you, we did, in fact find the realtor sign. He
[the previous owner] had chucked it, and more debris, on the far side of the garage -- but he had nailed the gate shut so we couldn't go back there during the re-inspection or walk through. Ha ha on us! We spent the day sorting the debris and found all kinds of things -- including old pipes, a camping grill* (complete with a can of kerosene! How safe!) a huge pane of glass, enough storm debris to build a forest and the contents of the compost container they had at the back of the yard (gee, thanks!) At one point we dug up a huge Something and we both said "Is that a skull?!" Thankfully, it wasn't. Then one wall of the tool shed fell over, ending the debate as to whether or not we should take it down. By 6 pm we had successfully sorted what was the 5 1/2 foot wall of debris (excluding decomposed compost) into four piles: Rocks and Cinder Blocks, Branches and Leaves, Nail-studded Boards and Building Supplies, and Bizarre Garbage (*see above). Now we need to figure out how to get rid of it.

The floors are coming along, albeit, two days behind. The sanding took
[MrKnotty] a lot longer than he anticipated (tool issues) and we were up last night until 4 am staining the floors trying to stay on schedule. [MrKnotty] forgot to wear his respirator and when he started babbling about Snow White and laughing hysterically, I said "Oh, my God! The fumes!" at the same time he said " I think the floor is moving..."

We went back to the house to finish the floors this morning but, due to the rain, they are still too wet. Ha ha on us -- the Sequel! That's when we decided to work on the yard and discovered another of the
[previous owners'] parting gifts (see also:Broken Picture Frame in the Oven, Broken Toilet and, Stealing the Shelves from the New Bathroom Cabinet Because You Never Know When You Might Need Them).

Several neighbors came by to say hello -- and one who reported seeing
[the previous owners who claimed to have already be in Little Rock and therefore absent at closing] driving by the house several times on Saturday. The neighbor wanted to know what they were doing and thought it was odd. Hey, us too! Perhaps they miss their garbage.

Anyhoo, we have fans running all over the house in an attempt to dry the sucker out. Please keep your fingers crossed so that Toby, the electrician, the cable guy and the security guy don't stick to the floors or have to learn how to defy gravity.

Really, I know I sound grumpy but we are happy to have a home -- just wish the previous owners weren't so, well, I don't know the word for it. I have no idea what they were thinking.

Please pray for low humidity!!!!!

Take care!

So, that's it in a nutshell, folks. The stolen/broken list which began with All the Curtains and Curtain Rods in the House continues to grow. We had all the locks changed before it could get any worse.

It really is a pretty house. But we're in the middle of an exorcism of the previous owners right now. Wish us luck and I'll be in touch soon.

1 comment:

knottymama said...

"Stealing the Shelves from the New Bathroom Cabinet"

Seriously?!? Were they wearing those cheap halloween masks with the rubber band stapled to the back? It would really complete the visual for me if they were.